I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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