i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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