I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize