I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
