doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
