and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Randomize