Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
