You made me cry and you don't even care
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
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