Porn is love you can see.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
