Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Someone shit on the floor
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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