We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
