Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
