Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Randomize
