i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Randomize
