butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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