Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
Randomize
