Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Condoms? Check. Glitter? Check. Fuck me pumps? Double check. Dignity? No where to be found. I'm about to homewreck the shit out of that dumb bitch.
I've been meaning to talk to you about your lack of self-respect these days and the toll it's taking on your vagina.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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