I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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