idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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