I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
