Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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