Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
