Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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