you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
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Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
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Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
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