I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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