You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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