i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
