Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize