i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
