um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football