shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
23 Fathers Confess The Best Way They’ve Messed With Their Daughter’s Boyfriend
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
25 Children of Helicopter Parents Admit The Most Horrible Thing They Were Put Through
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this