Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
