I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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