Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize