Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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