I want to stick my p in your. b.
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
