Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
