CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
