I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
he laminated a picture of his dick.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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