marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize