with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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