WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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