Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Your dad touched me again.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
