we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
