you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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