Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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