Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
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