She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
