Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Randomize
