Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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