I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
