New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
